Caring for an elderly type 2 diabetic who refuses medical care
I live with my grandfather who has recently come to terms with the fact that he is type 2 diabetic. However, though he has finally come to terms with this he refuses to seek medical treatment or even discuss options with a medical professional. He has had a very poor diet for his entire life and is now 82 years old and has had a colostomy bag for years. His feet and legs up to his knees look awful and won’t get better (I have photos that I won’t share here due to the graphic nature, however I will share them with anybody who would be willing to take a look and give me their opinion as I am very uneducated about any of this). I believe he is doing everything wrong still even though he has finally accepted that he has diabetes. The only changes he has made are cutting out some of the sugar in his diet and taking cinnamon supplements. He has huge black holes in the bottoms of his feet and his legs up to his knees are bright red and swollen with huge open sores around his calves. He says there is a substantial amount of an oily substance constantly coming out of what looks like blisters that then turn into the open sores I mentioned above. He can barely walk without a cane anymore and is in constant pain but I believe that he thinks if he finally seeks medical attention at this point that he’s let it go for too long and they’ll amputate both his legs, which he of course doesn’t want to happen so in turn he refuses to seek treatment. He is very stubborn and hard headed and I’m unable to force anything upon him no matter how badly I want him to be seen by a professional. I just need any advice on what I can do to make him more comfortable and what I can do within the home to ease his pain and symptoms. Ideally, he would agree to see a doctor, but I don’t see that happening any time soon, so until I finally get him to that point I would like to make things as easy as possible on him and try to help him in any way I can until he is ready to help himself. Again any advice or information is greatly appreciated as I am not well educated on this topic. Thank you for reading and for any responses. 🙏🏼
, this seems like such a tough position to be in as a caregiver. I appreciate you looking for some advice on how to make your grandfather more comfortable. That sure sounds really painful. I hope people here can chime in with some advice or personal experiences.
We have some general tips on supporting a loved one with diabetes that might be helpful: https://type2diabetes.com/living/supporting-someone, https://type2diabetes.com/living/support-someone.
These articles may also be helpful as well: https://type2diabetes.com/symptoms/cuts-sore-healing, https://type2diabetes.com/complications/infections, & https://type2diabetes.com/living/infection-risk.
Please keep us updated on how things go if you feel comfortable doing so.
Warmly, Minel (Team Member)
Hi
. I saw this post and really felt the need to check in. Your grandfather's issues sounded critical. I hope you were eventually able to get him to see a doctor, but if you couldn't, I hope you are at peace with his decisions. You can't help someone who doesn't want to help himself and you can't make decisions for someone who is still considered to be of sound mind. My mother was diabetic and had no thyroid due to Graves disease. It was heartbreaking when she began showing signs of vascular dementia. For a long time, she was at a stage where she was competent enough that we couldn't force her to accept help, but she was sick enough that she would constantly forget she was diabetic and forget to take her synthroid. We couldn't do anything for her until she finally forgot her synthroid so many days in a row that she almost died. At that point, she was declared unable to care for herself and we could step in. I agonized over her care up until that point, but I also knew that I want that same freedom in my later years, the freedom to live on my own terms until I can't anymore. Please let us know how you are doing if you can. Thinking of you and wishing you the best. - Lori (Team Member)
